What I learned in 2025
Seeing the games being played and what games I am opting out of playing.
Prioritizing my peace. To the best of my ability, not putting myself in places or relationships or situations that make me chronically overextend myself. The energy of the people and places you’re surrounded by have a big impact on your well-being.
Not taking things personally. Sometimes people can’t offer honesty, compassion, or presence because they can’t offer it to themselves.
The things people cringe at in others are often the places they haven’t learned to love in themselves.
The power of silence. Many times, saying nothing let things resolve themselves. Also, no response is a response.
The power of stillness. Tired, distracted, busy people are easier to control. Slowing down is demonized, but nature moves in seasons. Distance brings clarity. Most people are scared to be still. Also because I love a good sports analogy: a handstand hold is harder than a handstand walk.
The power of doing less—a message that came through yoga, acting, and singing classes.
Instead of arguing, I remove myself from conversations where someone isn’t listening and only wants to be right. If both people are listening to each other and cooperating, you can get somewhere; if they aren’t, you’re wasting energy.
I distanced myself from “friends” who tried to humble me, even in a subtle or joking way. Even if they also praised me a lot. If the relationship feels confusing, something is off.
No one is perfect. I can be grateful for the love people are capable of and still love them at a distance if it doesn’t meet my self-respecting standards.
Grateful for situations that revealed people’s true colors. They sharpened my vision and discernment.
Being exhausted helped me get real about who and what I have energy for.
I no longer share my dreams with people whose hands are too small to hold them.
I’ve become allergic to mansplaining and opinions presented as The Ultimate Truth. I’m more drawn to people who share their stories and trust me to draw my own conclusions. As Alan Watts put it: “‘Kindly let me help you or you will drown,’ said the monkey, putting the fish safely up a tree.” What worked for you might not work for me, and I’m much more discerning about people selling me their ideas of how to do things.
If you have to work that hard to regulate your nervous system, maybe you’re in the wrong place, relationship, or situation.
When things don’t work out, it’s often redirection. I trust God has a better plan.
The little things add up, for better or worse. I realized I don’t want the small things to feel hard. I want them to feel easy and luxurious.
Feeling like you can’t trust anyone is one of the saddest ways to move through the world.
The most open-hearted people tend to be the least judgmental.
Ask for help. Sometimes that’s the lesson.
I’ve gotten better at self-respecting boundaries. Thinking of myself as both the kid and the parent helps—it’s the parent’s job to protect the kid.
Just because you can doesn’t mean you have to.
New respect for anyone who dances in heels!
When everything feels overwhelming, focus on the next step. Not the whole staircase.
Sometimes balance comes from experiencing the opposite. If trust feels broken by others, maybe it’s an invitation to trust yourself more. If no one believes in you, maybe it’s time to strengthen your belief in yourself.